“God
does not call the equipped. He equips the called.” - Unknown
I have seen this quote, or a variation of it, for several
years now. I tried to find its origin, but failed. I like to think someone like
Albert Einstein said this. He was a brilliant man with a deep faith in God.
I often write about “saying yes” before my practical brain
has the opportunity to close the gate that is my mouth. My “yes” seems to come
when my heart knows it is the right thing to do and my eyes see no barriers. Once
I’ve said “yes” I sometimes doubt my abilities, but then I remember this quote.
(Don’t get me wrong, I have learned to say “no” when it is appropriate).
When I said “yes” to the Avon Walk in 2010 it did not seem
daunting until I started training and planning to go to Houston for the 2011
Walk. I have now walked in four cities and will walk for the fifth time in
Boston this year. My goal is to walk in each city where Avon hosts an event.
Based on the list of cities, I have two additional walks in my future.
I never doubted saying “yes” to my friend Tina when she
needed help with transporting her mother to Boston for cancer treatments. I had
the time. I was treated at the same facility so I knew the ropes. As it turned
out, every trip into Boston was uneventful. The winter days were sunny and the
roads were clear. I never had to drive in a snow storm. Unplanned trips
occurred when I was available; at times that I was not normally free. Getting up
and leaving my house early was never a chore. Each event, each day with Linda
reminded me of God’s grace. It was never difficult for me to do what needed to
get done.
At the time my husband lovingly asked if I really wanted to
do this. Was I prepared for how this was going to end? I assured him that I was
aware of the risks and I knew what I was getting into. And I was prepared,
because as our time together progressed I watched Linda deteriorate. I witnessed
the tear-filled anger. I watched as her body wasted away. It was clear that she
would become one of the 41,000 people in the U.S. who will die of breast cancer
this year alone.
I spent time with Linda less than 24 hours before she died.
She appeared to be sleeping and was unresponsive to my greeting, which was new.
However, her nurse lovingly assured me that I should talk to her. So I did. I told
her about the weather, and that I got a new car that I thought she’d like. I read
from the Book of John. I knew she was going to die.
I thought I was prepared. I wasn’t. I wasn’t prepared for
the devastating heartbreak or the tears. I wasn’t prepared for the loss or
helplessness that I would feel. Yet God equipped the called and I know this
experience will forever be with me.
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