Finding Joy

Used with permission from David Loose

I cried when I learned there was nothing more the doctors could do.

There were no tears when I heard of your death.

Grief is like that.

It is the living in the hard places.

The desperate wish that things would be different.

You asked if you could call me.

My heart sank when you told me the news.

There were tears when I told my husband.

The grief started then.

All those months ago.

There is always hope.

But I knew differently.

I never want to be that person.

The one who insisted “you’ve got this beat.”

Because life is not like that.

Life is messy.

It caught me off guard.

And hurts in the deepest part of my soul.

Until I remember more of the good times together

Than the past few, painful months.

That is when I find joy.

If you enjoy my blog and would like to follow me on Facebook, I can be found at The Reluctant Survivor. And on Twitter @relucsurvivor.